Y Saturday, March 15, 2008Y
3:35 PM
whoopie. can blog again after finish doing bio stuff and a bit of chem. but the hor, a lot of stuff cannot get into my head. so yea decided to take a rest. and and i feel qi4!!!! but not to the extend that i will explode. but i was damn qi4 yesterday that i scolded f word in a conver [ ofcuz with the permission of te person]. aiya after i know more details abt it i was super grossed out lar. like i dunno. and MC says porn is EVIL!!!! LOL. ok i have no comments. ya and i started saying how big mouth people can be. wah lao lke stop spreading stuff that hurt people. i have no intention of knowing this in te first place. like i rather not know of it. cuz i was about to explode when i knew it. but since i know already, then just try to get the big picture correct with no bias-ness involved. at first i was sort of a neutral standard. as in i dun really feel anything is wrong. BUT im wrong. from the details that i know, i cannot stand it. im rather open i will say, so if i dun like it, as in not to the extend that there are moral issues, just not very willing to accept la, means must be smth quite big lar. anyway its not abt porn. cuz i said earlier that mc said porn is evil. but it has nth much to do with it lar. haha. im just a bit er grossed out la. as in wat kind of relationship are they in? im just curious. and 明明就有什么的，为何要假装不是呢？明明就是他，为何要说谎呢？ok i dun think anyone gets what i am saying. but yea. HAHA me and MC are living in the world of 2007. hahahaha. ok nvm. can i ask a qn? why is he so oblivious to my emotions. a bit dumb isn't he.-siu
Y Friday, March 14, 2008Y
6:05 PM
woo today got DALT ten i can go leh. wahaha cuz my fever tui4 le. then yea. we did a bit, really a tiny bit of long2 today. then shi tous revised their shi1s and i should tai2 my leg higher!!! always forget. then got one time i tan4 jiao3 lift up wrong leg. omg i think i look retarded but then the second time i rmb leh!!! then later jiao lian ask us to pai2 in out shi tou shi wei. then fongmei today nv come lar. then pinky also nv come. so camelia became my shi wei[temporary]. then i think we got mo4 qi4. haha. aww fongmei cannot chi1 cu4 oh...haha. then jiao lian made us do the tiao4 thing. wah then ask me jump higher and higher. wah i too short liao. cannot jump lar. then later must jump forward. haha like standing broad jump liddat. then a bit weir lar. but then me and camelia can guo4 guan1 just tt jiao lian want me to jump higher lor. then my pair [me and cam] jumped further then hong and guo. ooh haha. im shorter but i jump further. im heavier too! yea haha. but i think jiao lian made me jump a lot of times ): then my jiao a bit numb numb ache ache de feeling. guai guai de. its totally weird feeling lar. then it hink cam yao2 me tt time, i nv jump cuz i tiao4 bu4 qi3. then she say nvm rest rest. haha so nice. cuz she also shou3 suan1 la. tai2 me very tiring de leh. cuz im uber heavy ): then later we jump one by one. then dunno whther is it jiao lian say me, he said wa 她跳好像有轻功这样 o.O dunno if its referring to me or not. then i turn ard and look at cam then we laugh. lol. but i still think jiao lian made me jump a lot of times. cuz tt time we jump up first one by one, then he say ok first time leh. or is it 2nd. cannot rmb. wah then i chao shocked cuz i tot i jump like some retard like that. then later he say can leh. then wah i very happy. then i turn ard and hi-10 with cam. then he after that say ke2 yi3 zai4 gao1 yi4 dian3. wah then i went huh...then he made me jump one more time. then after that he ask me to jump and do e cycling thing. then i cannot do lor. its just feels weird. and i feel im going to fall. then cam hold my waist there until quite painful>.<>-yingsiu
Y Thursday, March 13, 2008Y
10:25 PM
WOW! my body has decided to kua3 on this very day. i thought im fine after the fever subsided with panadol! BUT my forehead is slightly burning and my feet are like shaking in cold. its like white and plain cold. as in literalyl cold. there is no blood which accounts for the fact that it is white. haiz. i really think i should work like mad to stop being emotional hey c'mon thats not my style man. where has teh american ah boy thing go? i sort of dun find it in me man. where are my dudes?! where?! all i see is myself crying at romance movies which i once though was so darn stupid and melodrama seah. im sitting in front of my comp, typing this post and hoping my fever doesn go up tomorow or not later my mama dun let me do fot DALT. but then yup yup im sure my daddywill let me go. cuz he goes to trng though he is sick. and i just confirmed with him. heh heh. ok why am i laughing. im sad lehs. yup see i have changed. i used to laugh at ppl who use stuff like larhs, lorx, lehs. like the extra 's' and 'x' behind. but see what im doing now? im using them too! its like why have i changed till the totall opposite of the previous me?! im sad. im broken hearted. im tired[mentally]. im having suicidal thoughts. thought of just going away where there will be no troubles at all. i know that is going to be so irresponsible but wth man. i hate life >.<
8:02 PM
i feel im going to explode with all the thoughts in me. i cannot just digest it. oh stop being paranoid. it will nv happen to me. just think tt way. yes i must. anyway i reall regretted hearing that piece of news. its just so erm i dunno. i just feel a bit weird. omg. and yea oh my ass man. pt says its weird how ppl can express themselves differently. like chuxi goes oh my goose. and yea. and YAY i collected my $150 today. WOO! haha its a cheque so forget about robbing me. And nope i wun buy food for you. heh heh. i hate maths. i cannot do like half e paper. shit omg im so gonna fail block test can...i cried just now. Becuase mc made me all emo-ish and stuff. And i reflected and saw how much i changed since i left NYPS. Leaving 5h/6h. such a wonderful class. it was a point whereby i actually ENJOYED going to school yea. but now everything's changed. I am no longer the me in 6h. ive just changed. some ppl say i am a workaholic but im not cuz im jsut a bum hwo lazes around now. And some eg. debra tay says im DAMN NIANG now. really? i dun feel it. is that the me? or is it just a mask i wear everyday to cover up the sad reality in life. as mask that covers my tears, my agony, my unhappiness i have towards life. its just so freaking bad to hear ice changed so much. have i just lost the me when i was carefree and felt life's wonderful. is this the me that is going to be stuck with me for life. is that te mask im going to put up everyday. or has the mask just became part of reality, a part of me. a part of me that changed. all i want is just to lead a normal life. to find the old me. the true me. i dunno whether it still exist. i dunno if tehre is such a thing. but if there is, wait for me. wait for the time whereby i will see light. wait for the day of yingsiu's enlightenment. maybe you should help to find the old me. or is the new me jsut better? i really dunno. why cant you just come and save me. im in darn hell now. at least my live is in a turmoil. i cant sort out my thoughts. im just going to explode one day when i finally cant keep everything to myself. or maybe i will just sink into depression. or maybe i will jsut change again. change for the better or for the worst, i have absolutely no idea. i just want to be comfortable with who i am. and hope others can be comfortable with the present me. i just want to lead a normal life. is that really so difficult?-siu
12:20 AM
i feel empty now. empty in the middle of the night. as ususal, i can't seem to find the words to describe my present emotions. i feel a bit of this this this and that. i have no idea what i am doing now. lazing around? doing nothing? i feel like im such a bum man. waking up not doing much stuff. going on to msn to chat. sleep. then the cycle repeats itself. is that what my day is gonna be like in my future. well i hope not cuz there are so many things out there waiting for me. And ppl around me, trying to comfor me, trying to help me to their max. but nothing is going to change unless i am going to be more discipline and stuff. i really dunno how to change my life. anyone out there wants to help me organize my super messed up life? hope u will be there for me to lend a helping hand.
Y Tuesday, March 11, 2008Y
11:50 PM
I don't know why i am so emotional nowadays. I just cant seem to control myself. I keep telling myself to put away those useless emotions away. they are of a hindrance to my work. i cant work cant do anything with my emotions being the way they are. they are playing tantrums on me . i know ive changed a lot. as confirmed by debra and adrian. yep yep good friends from 6h. went out today and was raining. dunno why it has been rainy all year long. anw apprently im the only one who cried today when i watched the leap years. well debra found it absolutely boring. adrian felt li lin was pretty or he like her. and i was crying cuz it was so heart wrenching to me. i dunno why but i felt so painful too. see how my emotions like to play tricks on me. its jsut a movie is what debra keep telling me. i know it myself too but why cant i just accept that? as in i noe its just a moive, real life is not so drama [but i always think it is] but i just cannot digest that thought. i cry for somehting that is not true? why can i feel for the movie when everyoneelse does not. why am i so emotioanl and vulnerable? can someone ans me or console me. and i just want to confide in someone but but i just cannot find my confidante except but to cry to myself when im all alone. And i always cry when i hear sad songs. esp love songs. but why have i truned to such a crybaby. i used to laugh at pingting who cries at almost every single thing. but im going to be degenerating to that level. i din cry in the secret movie cuz i dun like jay chou. and basically i was much stronger then. but wat is the damn reason for my weakeness? maybe i need a shrink. im just bring emotional. i just just love and hate these stupid emotions of mine. i love emotions to tell me that im still a human. i still live with human characteristics. but they are going to be the cause of my downfall. whne i fail every single subject in my life. i have never felt this weak before. can anyone save me. i hope someone can. but not at the moment. not even him who tries hard to but is bad at. i really really am darn vulnerable. i feel emo from time to time. i feel like shit all the time. i feel high occasionally. i feel im at the verge or insanity. this point whereby one feels one is going to be insane is called yingsiu's pt cuz i prob discovered it and i feel it all teh time. i need to be stronger. pls...-siu-
Y Monday, March 10, 2008Y
8:39 PM
ok im so darn pissed now but i shall not elaborate on the matter. but im so so so so sorry that i totally vent my pissness/anger in me on someone. of cuz its mr dear daddy. im like er so grossed out and all i did was to just take it out on daddy. its not his fault that im pissed just that he was talking to me so i was like &&*^%^$(^%(^*_& la. im really sorry if i sayed something that i should not. ok i also shooed the birthday boy [as he described himself to me] away lar. paiseh. i also 心情不好 so i totally shooed him away and spewed awful stuff at him. so yar paiseh lar. aiya . nvm. time to relax man ying siu! i know i can do this. if i think i can i can. okok back to normal stuff. went to school today, to do chemistry SIA. I thought i was gonna be late but then yea i wasn't! hmm after that i went home so i went to the bus stop. yea i met zz there. For a moment i forgot his name. if u read this pls dun kill me. ok he was hmm around with his friends so yea. then he said whe i left i SUDDENLY DISAPPEARED. hello im a human. i walk ok. i dun suddenly disappear. like pfft! im gone man. abracedabra. a whisp of smoke appears and im home. ok its not meant to b e sacarstic or anything. but probably no one has ever said that i left suddenly. well its just that you are too engrossed with yr ahem friends. ok doubt u will ever find yr way here la. yea i went home and wanted to mug but then i ended up falling asleep so. i wasted my afternoon. yepyep tts sbt it man. im trying to save this blog druing the hols man . okok going out tomorrow with lets see, debz, hwj and jr? i think so la. im so gonna be broke cuz i need to buy lots of presents. DEBRA or cuz. then its jeraldine's since its liek coming soon. then erm chun en's one cuz hers is not exactly near lar. but then got no time to buy in btw. yup dun need to buy for daddy since he doesn want and he is too broke to buy me anything. but its fine seriously. then erm still have steffi, clarice,and zz on the list. omg omg omg im going broke ok. hmm im buying zz cuz cuz yea u shld noe. shant say here in case some ba1 gua4 ppl come read. so so yea! hope u make my day man whoever it may be.-ying siu-
Y Saturday, March 8, 2008Y
3:35 PM
actually erm this is supposed to add on to the previous post on obs. yea. hey clarice says im cute and im like doraemon, as in i act like doraemon. it does not mean i look like doraemon ok! hahahahaha. yea i came to psot some random photos. photos that meant to capture stuff from obs. but not acitivities i did in obs cuz no phone marh. 
ok this is really blur. ermerm so sorry for it. yea but. from left to right:
top: Mauricette [instructor], Clarice, He Lin, Kim Lien, Yen My, Mei Juan, Ka Kay, Jun Ying
Bottom: Shermaine, Vanice, Yvonne, Hui Ci, Ting Yi, ME!, Sarah
All: BARKER!!!
This is where i record my activities and reflections. It is sort of a journal.
Just an OBS sticker
My certificate that says i completed OBS
A wristband and ' Outward Bound Singapore' is printed on it. yea its blue. had other colours like red, black, orange, yellow and maybe others tt i dunno of. yup tts all!
ok im feeling sian now. dun feel like doing anything yet. but have a lot of stuff to do,
#need to do OBS reflections for LA
#Mug for tests
#try to understand what physics is all about
#Hoping not to fail IH though it is only 50%
#All SIAs that are going on
gogo bang my head liao. ok i MUST perservere. or not wat is obs? what has obs taught me? oush yourself, push yourself beyond self perceived limite. challenge yrself. i noe io can do it der. just like how i pushed myself to get to the top of the rock wall with blisters and cuts. i dunno why i just feel emotional. ok ok i shall stop ok. but the song makes me feel a bit more emo lar. erm its 25 minute by M.L.T.R. [Michael Learns To Rock] . yup yup. ok i really really want to jus tscream all my fristrations out. jsut let off the stuff in me. to scream to jump to hit to slap to box to kick to do anything that just let me vent my frustrations. but but i can only cry in a corner of my room. a place where no one knows. a me that no one has ever seen. a place filled with secrets. a place full of valuable memories. a place full of tears. a place dearest to me. a place that seem to be my confidante. and now i cant fa xie on someone as i think i said b4 i feel paiseh doing so. its like who am i to the person. the person has his/her own live [shant reveal gender]. i cant keep disturbing the person. and besides the person's phone is broke.
why why why am i so affected??????
11:55 AM
cheers everyone! for i am BACK from OBS!!!! wooo!!!!! ok i should not be so happy because it means i have to start mugging. i shall blog abt OBS as promised. i never break promises alrite. anw i slept for like 6 h after obs b4 waking up to eat dinner and cont sleeping after tt. i just realised the pigginess in me. and i took a long bath tt lasted for like almost 1/2 an hour.1st Day [3rd March]
i was rather excited about going to obs la as heard from many people that obs was really really fun. so yea went to sch then took buts to punggol jetty then down a bumboat to pulau ubin then to obs. journey was short lar but a bit shaky then i was like din really like the feeling lar. so our instructor was mauricette then she collected the valuables and did some admin stuff. ten we changed to our wet attire and went to learn how to kayak. it was cold la. but we kayaked for a short while only and in a short distance cuz i dunno why. it was a tri yak. so cool nv seen one yet. only done double kayak and seen a single kayak. but not a triyak. so yea. mauricette made us capsize our kayak and then get onto it. its to ensure tt we know how to sort of rescue ourselves when our kayak capsize. ya and and we actl had to carry this uber heavy rowboat down to some platoon(is this how u spell it) or wtv lar. it was so darn heavy ok. kns. yea and we are all girls so GIRL power! haha ok im lame. then after tt we pitch tent so lan4 lar tt kind of tent but its rather easy to pitch since it requires so low amt of energy. then we also cooked dinner- instant noodles and some can food. after tt showered and yay we could sleep. BUT the tent was so freaking smelly it stinks lor. and ya tt nite i slept with hmm sarah, junying (a.k.a. june), vanice and yvonne. the day was quite short actl so yea. and it was damn cold at nite lor. i gung ho la, sleep in shorts and short sleeve t shirt. at nite freeze till like siao! then smth really funny happened at nite :)
2nd Day [4th March]
We lugged our super heavy backpack onto some boat before we went to row our rowboat. The rowboat is slow heavy and yea. its just slow, and we had to row it for ard 5 km. and we took abt 4h? ard there la. the max a rowboat can go is avt 3km/h? i think so, if i din rmb wrongly. the boat included june, sarah, vanice, shermaine, me, yvonne, clarice (a.k.a. mummy darine). yup everyone is like from 302 except shermaine haha! on the boat we talked about a lot of funny stuff. like ppt and the da da da alarm. and the south china sea and yea. we were rowing our boat halfway then we found the other barker boat being washed to e shore and hit the rocks by the strong waves. it was scary and i think it was traumatising for hui ci. then kakay and ting yi went out to help push the boat in to the sea again. after that our boat ran into some problems lar. we were rowing past this keylong, then this rope got caught onto some rader of wtv it is called lar. then our boat was stuck . then this rope was connected to some floating stuff and it was pulled closer to us. then we tried to use our oar to push it away and then suddenly A LOT of insects (believed to be sandflies) flew off from the floating thing. we were so darn scared, we tried protecting everypart of our body with caps and wtv we could find. in total at least like got 100 lor. im not being kua1 zhang1 but its really true. we tried rowing away but it jsut din work. in the end we blew our whistle and suisen instructor came over. he said he wun save us and want us to row away by ourselves. we already try so hard lor, he still dun want to help. then he say wat we are not trying hard enough, want us to try harder. then we really pia like mad also cannot. in the end he just towed us away lor. kns. then our campsite for te nite is this public campsite whereby there is absolutely no facilities at all lar. like u can dig a hold and shit inside tt kind. tt nite we had to do sentry duty. barker was supposed to do from 2-4 am. then my tent did 3-4 am. 2-3am was done by ppt tent. our sentry duty also had ppl like vanice, yvonne, clarice and shermaine (a.k.a. spermy) haha. ya my tent tt nite was me, june, sarah, kakay and hui ci. then we saw some dogs during sentry duty so we used to the camping sticks to hit the floor as instructed by instructors to show them that we are awake. like to scare teh dogs away. then the tent tt nite was like sai la. i slept on 2 huge rocks that was damn painful. cant even sleep properly la. then somemore at like 7 plus got music blasting from jb. as in from the place we are in, we can hear the music so loudly lor. until like 4plus 5 then it went off. so the songa were like repeated from 7-5. hey tts like 10 h. omg i think i nearly knew how to sing liao. it was also so freaking cold but yea outside the tent during sentry duty was so much comfortable than sleeping inside the tent. also everyone cannot bathe since there is like no facilities available la.
oh actl i forgot smth, b4 the rowboat thingy, we did some team games, suisen also.
3rd Day [5th March]
we woke up strike tents, ate some stuff etc. the usual stuff lar. after tt we walked a short distance to the quarry. omg so cool can!!!! we were supposed to build a raft. its good ok. it could float even with all 14 of us in barker as well as mauricette. then we rowed ard. but then i think suisen's one some parts like got disintegrated la. so dunno how. but the water was shioka! it was nice and cooling and REFRESHING! it was really nice. but soon we had to keep our raft and stuff. so yea. but we were given a last chance to take a dip into the quarry so sort of clean off t dirt on us cuz we might not bathe at nite again. but we did anw. after packing up stuff. changing into clean dry clothes, we trekked. from te quarry to ubin viallage, to german girl shrine, to camp 2. its was so damn long. plus our damn heavy backpacks, we nearly died alrite! when we were trekking to ubin village, to see th supposedly kampong life, which was totally not kampong at all, it started drizzling. then ting yi said aiya its only a drizzle, wun be big rain der. then suddenly boom ! the rain got so much bigger. its just like so qiao la. then ting yi said are u trying to say i am a jinx. then june said ya. haha so funny. and though it rained we still continued. and me june and ting yi sang songa along the way. like erm my love, 25 min, paint my love (solo by ting yi) , girlfriend, the best damn thing, everything back but you. our songs sounded like a remix since we sang parts of it cuz we could not really rmb e lyrics and tune. i feel so proud after trekking cuz we trekked like 11km without knowing it in like 4h in te big rain. it was so unexpected. it was rather fast cuz actl it was extimated that we were su pposed to take like 5 h. so we finally trekked to camp 2 and we stoned for like 10 min. cuz every part of our body is aching. our shoulder, hips, leg, everywhere lar. ten me and shermaine got like blue-blacks on our hips there. omg. i had blisters on my feet and on my hand there. sucks lar. and we were drenched from head to toe. so it just made our backpacks heavier causing it to be heavier. after tt some went to pitch tent, some cooked, some went to shower first. then later we cooked and yea. had some debrief thing then went to sleep.
our sleep wasnt easy ok. cuz we were te last to bring our tents down to our camp site. so the lights were off then we cannot see. so brave sarah sort of knocked on the room and asked the instructor if we could on the lights as it was pitch black and it was not lights out time yet. and there was a lampost which was supposed to be a lightsource for us ok. then he just said, go down there to the lamppost, and u will see a switch. just turn it on. then he went back to the room to sleep. wah lao. where got liddat der. anw we went to on it. it was so darn freaky. and te place was wet so we were so scared tt we would fall of and roll down .ratehr its me who is scared. haha. but this nite felt mroe comfortable then the previous nite. but the previous nite was more interesting. tonight's tent was the same as the previous nights'. erm me, sarah, june, kakay and huici.
4th Day [6th March]
It was raining and yea we stayed at camp 2 for a while b4 moving off. we were last to do so. we went to the jetty there to this thing. we stood in a rowm put our arms over each other's shoulder and sang the song my bony lies over the ocean. then we had to to teh reverse action when the word has a 'b'. like if we are standing then it goes 'my Bony ....' we had to squat down. then got another 'b' word, we had to stand up if were squatting down. our body ache liek mad liao, ten we do this, ache even more. haha. after tt we sort of walked to camp 1. wah it was like heaven man. we did high elements tt day. erm barker was divided into 2 grps. so my grp went to do the snake and ladder thing. then had to climb this rope ladder first, then this erm snake like metal ladder, then finally the rock wall. i climb till the end of the metal ladder there. ten vanice was below. oh yea we had to climb in pairs. and if one wants to go down, both goes down. so yea in the end i stopped there, and my heart nearly popped out can. so scary!!! but yea. after tt we took a break then we went to do the rock wall. it is te wobbly kind. like just attached to cable on top, then below got some metal chains chaining it down to the floor. so it wasn static and it was damn difficult. my grp could not climb up la. at first i climb past only the 1st square. then after resting for a while, i climbed up further till e top!!. yea halfway rite, i dun know how to continue cuz i couldnt reach anything above me. ok i noe im short lar. so cannot reach. but other barkers were like telling me wat to do and their encouragement really helped me. and yvonne wa slike telling me how to climb. barker is really very very nice. ok so mushy lar. not me man! then i just pushed myself and i smacked the highest pt. then when i came down i was like tearing cuz i , i , dunno how to describe. just full of emotions. but dun think anyone saw tt. after tt we went to prepare for dinner. it was the best tihng ever out of the days there. we had nicer things to eat. and we ate with mauricette. wooo! ya we had eggs, onion, garlic, oil, wok, luncheon meat erm veggies and ya cant rmb alrdy. had campbell soup also. haha. but it was nice. after tt we washed up, pitched tent and showered. i slept tt nite with erm vanice,yvonne, shermaine, clarice and ofcuz me! yea i slept in shorts and t shirt at nite. of cuz it was cold. then i brought track pants down. so i just slipped it up when it felt cold. and clarice slept in a 's' shape then her knees on me. at first i was sleeping then i felt ey? wat is this thing on me. then i woke up and see. it was clarice! haha so funny. then i cont sleeping. and ppt took the clean tent cleaned by clarice they al the previous nite. then we took the tent i slept in cleaned by us last nite. so yea. haiz. bo bian. got ppt this kind of person.
5th Day [7th March]
yea its the day tt we are going home. a day tt i looked forward to. during the camp i was like missing everything and everyone. ok not everyone. some only. haha. then i dujnno why but i felt sad to leave. sad to leave this fantasy world with no worries on hw. no stress. just a camp with no worries. but i felt felt so emtional. anw we had lunch at the cookhouse, marvellous man. later we went to souvenior shop and i bought this obs tee tt cost $18. it is black in colour and dry fit. yea. later we went to the mph (multi purpose hall) to assemble. getting ready to go home . getting ready to go to the jetty. getting ready to go on the bumboat. but i just felt sad to leave. dunno why. i really din enjoy the process but after the camp, it is just so so so so memorable. obs to me is not fun. definitely not. but the memories are so precious. not all can be describe. but they will always stay with me. all the way. its so memorable. just cannot believe myself going through it. going through such a wonderful camp with so many friends. friends that started off as strangers, friends tt started off as being thought as dao to cute[its me lar :)] haha
BARKER! the fourteen of us and instructor mauricette :):):):)
.junying.clarice.yingsiu.kimlien.sarah.tingyi.vanice.yvonne.shermaine.kakay.huici.yenmy.helin.meijuan.
i will post pics later if have time.
-yingsiu-
Y Sunday, March 2, 2008Y
10:11 PM
eh sai lar..blogger cut my post can. then daddy's name got cutt off! HAHAHAHA. anw i wanted to say i can use my elbow to hit daddy's face to fa1 xie4. but i probably wun be able to reach it. So i shall jsut heat other parts. heh heh heh *EVIL laughter* anw, im lazy to cont. but i just feel the hatred for her whne i see her. i dunno why. is it because of her actions years back? i dunno i dunno. maybe not years. year or so? i dunno i really dunno!
10:10 PM
Its like OBS tomorrow! omgomgomg im uber excited! dunno why XD heh heh. ok i feel my bag is really full and im scared i cannot carry my stuff back to singapore after obs. yea but im really really HIGH! bet i nv felt like this before for a camp! ok maybe i did! haha.ok back to the other side. this blog is getting really dead. but I promise . i will blog abt OBS. REALLY i swear. ok...im feeling a bit disguste [ok tt may not be the best word] but yea, complicated feeling in me. about 2 matters. im really so zee zar zar. dunno how to describe. i tried to went my frustrations by punching a bolster instead of telling someone cuz im quite paiseh to do tt anymore. since i have like talked a lot of sad stuff to e person. so >.<>
-siu-